For some reason, tonight it feels like life is suffocating me to its very core. I don't think I can deal with all these anymore. At the moment, my mind is in a daze. It's like I'm trapped in a maize & I cannot find my way out. Staying at home doesn't make it much easier. I begin to wonder & compromise my beliefs on existence. I cannot keep a straight mind & I often stumble on things in my life which makes it harder for me to move on. It pains me brutally that people whom I used to be close with don't even bother catching up with me. This pains me till the very day. I sacrificed so much effort into something & in the end, no one see's it and they turned their backs on you. I will never forget the day I was betrayed by EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU. It that why you guys have cut contact with me? Just because I was not a part of something with you guys ?

I want to cry, really. But then what is there to cry? I feel so burdened. I have lost faith in myself. I don't even know how did I ever turned into someone I never thought I should be. My life is meaningless that if I am gone today, no one would ever notice because again, who am I to anyone ? I am nobody, that's who. I push away people from my life because I loathe people. I don't even have the strength to carry myself. 

For some reason, tonight it feels like life is suffocating me to its very core. I don't think I can deal with all these anymore. At the moment, my mind is in a daze. It's like I'm trapped in a maize & I cannot find my way out. Staying at home doesn't make it much easier. I begin to wonder & compromise my beliefs on existence. I cannot keep a straight mind & I often stumble on things in my life which makes it harder for me to move on. It pains me brutally that people whom I used to be close with don't even bother catching up with me. This pains me till the very day. I sacrificed so much effort into something & in the end, no one see's it and they turned their backs on you. I will never forget the day I was betrayed by EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU. It that why you guys have cut contact with me? Just because I was not a part of something with you guys ?

I want to cry, really. But then what is there to cry? I feel so burdened. I have lost faith in myself. I don't even know how did I ever turned into someone I never thought I should be. My life is meaningless that if I am gone today, no one would ever notice because again, who am I to anyone ? I am nobody, that's who. I push away people from my life because I loathe people. I don't even have the strength to carry myself.